Life in the In Between

It’s not all that bad

Thank you Justin Dream on Unsplash

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Have you experienced the highs of life?

I did when I was seventeen 
and went to college
When I was twenty five 
and got married 

When my son was chosen 
as the recipient 
of the highest average 
at his elementary school 

And later 
when he was chosen 
to perform his tin whistle 
at the church’s Christmas celebration 
where he led 
a group of dancing girls 
like a pied piper 
down the hall 
up to the stage 

And finally 
when my baby girl was born 

Then came the lows of life:

When I didn’t have 
a decent friend in college
And had to resort 
to obedience 
out of fear 
of losing her 

When he didn’t respond 
back in love 
and I had to work hard 
to try to earn it 
and it didn’t work in the end

When I fell sick 
and didn’t have a soul 
to attend to me 
for fifteen days 
when sickness came 
as a pounding head 
and blowing the nose 
through 15 boxes of tissues 

And finally 
when I had to swallow 
the bitter pill of betrayal 
and lose my dad 
at the same time 
It seems the lows tripled!

As high as the highs of life were 
And as low as the lows of life were 
I still knew I was going somewhere 
And had momentum going 

But this in-between 
This is so hard to pass by

I think I am going somewhere
I feel positive about it
And yet sometimes I am not so sure 

One day I am upbeat 
One day I am down in the trenches 
One day I am secretly wishing 
And cursing within me

It’s so hard to handle 
this in-between 
Where I know for sure 
what I don’t want 

And I also know for sure 
what I do want 

But will I achieve that 
which I do want 

And what about 
what I don’t want?

Will I get rid of it? 
At what cost?

Fear says 
hold onto it
Faith says 
let it go away in peace 

If I hold onto it, 
life goes on monotonously 

If I let it go away, 
there is a possibility 
of great loss 

What should I do? 
Should I hold on 
or should I let go?

And what would I do next? 
It’s not like life 
is waiting for me
Or is it?

There’s only one way to find out 
One way to know 
What lies ahead for me 
in the in-between 

So, relax!
Trust!
Have faith!
Let go! 
Breathe!

The in-between is a safe space 
It’s a space you need to be in 
before you let go to eternity 
What needs to go
To move forward 
with your destiny 

So, deep breathe 
Have faith!
Trust in God!

Let go of everything 
to the in-between 
And wait until 
the moment is right!

Peace ✌🏽 

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